Step aside early on a narrow pavement
Whoever moves first is usually whoever is least able to. Deciding to be the one who moves is free.
Not rated yet
The BeingKind editorsPublished How this is written
Why it lands
Narrow pavements produce a small game of chicken that is resolved by whoever concedes, and social hierarchy does a lot of the resolving — people with pushchairs, wheelchairs, sticks and shopping routinely step into the road because someone else did not move. Deciding in advance always to be the one who gives way removes you from the game entirely and costs a second.
How
Step aside early enough to be unambiguous, before the awkward mutual hesitation. Move into a gateway or a driveway rather than making them squeeze. Do not expect acknowledgement.
Answer if you want. It changes which ideas are shown first.
This is part of
A written list of what else helps in the same situation.
Related
Ask again the person who always says no
People who decline every invitation are usually not uninterested. Often they are waiting to be asked a fourth time.
5 minutesFreeA neighbor3 people did this
Apologize without the second half
“I'm sorry I snapped.” Full stop. No “but I was tired”, no “but you had just”.
5 minutesFreeSomeone you live with1 person did this
Answer the message you have been avoiding
The longer a reply is owed the harder it gets, and the person waiting has usually assumed something worse than the truth.
5 minutesFreeA friend1 person did this
Plan someone's first week, not their first day
Onboarding is concentrated in day one, which is the day nobody retains anything.
Half an hourFreeA stranger
Invite the new family twice
The first invitation is often declined out of uncertainty. The second is the one that establishes it was real.
5 minutesFreeA neighbor