Go to the small thing nobody else will
The exhibition, the first gig, the talk to nine people. Attendance at the small things is what people remember.
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Why it lands
Weddings and funerals fill themselves. The hard events are the ones where someone has put themselves out there at low stakes and high personal risk — the amateur play, the market stall, the reading. Those rooms are often nearly empty, and every person in them is counted individually and remembered for years. It is the cheapest form of support with the highest recall.
How
Say you are coming in advance, which is half the value — knowing someone will be there changes the week beforehand. Turn up early rather than late. Buy the thing, and say one specific thing about it afterwards rather than a general well done.
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